Call Me Hypochondriac, But My Childhood Is Over

"Childhood's over the moment you know you're gonna die." - Top Dollar (The Crow, 1994)

Now I'm more scared than ever.

I struggled to read the latest news online earlier. I was too scared to read. A misjudged blast in Glorietta 2 in Makati City killed 4 people (and its increasing by the minute). F*ck. That's right beside Park Square 2 Terminal where I take my ride home everyday. It felt like Death reminded me about something...

I voluntarily took absence from my visits to the doctor. I am bleeding inside. I have a polyp somewhere in me. I was scheduled for biopsy a few months back but the medical pre-requisites were just too overwhelming. The initial tests were like death itself! I am so f*cked up. My hands are cold right now. The biopsy result would tell me where the polyp is situated and whether its benign or malignant. I'm praying it hasn't metastized yet.

I was still kind of well when I took my absence. But things are getting out of hand lately. Symptoms are making themselves obvious once again. I know, I'm one stubborn ass. I promised myself I'll be back by November. October is not yet over and then this blast happened.

"Oh i, oh, Im still alive
Hey, i, i, oh, Im still alive
Hey i, oh, Im still alive
Hey...oh..."

Pearl Jam sings Alive on my media player. What a coincidence. BS

I could've been one of those people who died. YES, thank God I am still ALIVE.